It sucks reading something I know I shouldn't be reading. Something i know what I'll be upset over. But still, i did it. Isn't stupid to cry over reading someone's reblogs on tumblr? YES. But still i did it. Shouldn't have, really.

Read back all the way till the last post I've last seen. Still, it hurts. Surely, definitely. Why do i keep feeling this way? I hate it. Ssriously. I HATE FEELING THIS WAY. Yeah definitely, whatever I read kept me thinking. Thinking that you'd never loved me the way you love/loved her. I just hate thinking this way, but it's something that I can never avoid. WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY?

Yeah i could have sensed which are for her, and when i read those, my eyes just became more teary and more teary. It's this feeling that your heart feels so heavy, and all of a sudden you just really want to cry it all out or just even cry yourself to sleep. Yeah, i felt that. I've no mood to do anything else for now. NOTHING. & why? Cos of whatever that is sickeningly going through my head this instance. Why can't I just be unfeeling less? I'm sure it would be better.

I REALLY REALLY REALLY HATE FEELING THIS WAY. I DONT WANT TO FEEL IT EVER AGAIN. NO THANKS. I DONT WANT IT. But it's something I wouldn't be able to hide from, nor mention anything to anyone. I'm just gonna keep it to myself, and just suck it in. As usual. & by tomorrow, I'll just be the normal self I'm always am. It's always these hours that my mind would go wandering, wandering everywhere, wandering over stupid thoughts of mine (but definitely nothing that are senseless). Yup, I guess I've ranted enough. And i hope the person that I'm referring to, doesn't ever get to see this. Hopefully.